M&Ms and Other Failures

There is nothing I love more than being mom to my boys.  I love my job, and I look forward to teaching every day.  But nothing is more rewarding than being a mommy.

But there are lots of ways I'm sucking at it.  Sorry boys.  Mommy does her best, but she has a few mommy fail experiences.

For example, today was the Halloween party at preschool.  The kids got to go trick or treating around the church, and the church staff gave them treats.  Treats that the parents donated for the event.  Now, before you go shaking your head at me and thinking, "oh, MacKenzie... read the newsletter and you'd know to donate!" know that I DID read the newsletter and knew to donate.  I was all over that.  Sent in our treat donation with time to spare.  I took into consideration that my husband is a super over paranoid parent when it comes to choking hazards and went with M&Ms.  The originals.  Because according to Dave, the peanut and peanut butter variations are a death trap.

Papa took the boys in their costumes and brought them to and from preschool.  I came home from work and listened to their sweet stories about the day.

Dawson was a turtle too.  Eli was a fireman.  Karis was a berry.  Kingston said he didn't need to trick or treat tomorrow because he got enough today.

So naturally I checked out their loot, to determine what I would be snacking on after their bedtime. And that's when I knew I was a mommy failure, yet again.
Because the snacks in their bag fell into three categories.

1 - There was the dumb dumbs like me that sent in candy.  Because our three year olds REALLY need a bunch of sugar.  Come on dumb dumbs.   Get your head in the mommy game.

2 - The logical, and oh so reasonable snacks.  Such as raisins.  Gold fish crackers.  Good hearty things like that.  Children like them.  Sleeping patterns are not disturbed.  Win-win.

and 3 - Pinterest.  Do I really need to say more?  Cute ghosty marshmallows on a stick.  Ugh.  I want to throw up on you with my envy, Pinterest moms.  I want to be you.  Only even better by making those reasonable snacks cute.

Is it horrible that healthy and/or cute snacks never even crossed my mind?  I saw those tiny packaged M&Ms and pounced with excitement that the other moms would admire my choke free decisions for their children.  I told Dave to look in their bags when he got home and he just shook his head with a smile.  "Yeah.  We're not smart.  We're those parents."

Guess that goes right along with last night at church dinner.  My boys were playing nicely (in public mind you) for the first time in their entire three years of life.  "Kingston and Kyrie, Mommy is so proud of you!  You are playing so nicely at church!"

Kyrie's response:  "Yes mommy.  What do I get?"  :::Face meet palm:::  They may or may not have been bribed for good behavior in the past.

And don't even get me started on Ezra.  He's almost 12 months old and still wakes up twice a night most of the time.  We had a short two month jaunt of sleeping through the night, but those nights are over.  I've read every sleep training manual, strategy, and opinion.  And the attachment parenting side of me wins over every time.  I can't let that sweet boy cry.  He owns me.  I'm weak.  Call it whatever you want.  I hate crying more than I love my sleep.

I've made mistakes, and I know I'll make so many more.  But if the worse I do for my boys is give them a few too many M&Ms and rock them at night, I think we'll all be okay.